Coping Mechanisms & 3 Months No Running

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The title might seem like two separate thoughts, but they are so closely tied together.

During my first therapy session, we were discussing a few topics:

  • Problems

  • Coping Mechanisms

  • Core Thoughts

  • Strengths

After listing a number of items under each column, I was asked which was at the top of my Action list.

For me?

Coping mechanisms

Over the years of working with/on fitness, eating disorders, weight loss & self-esteem, my toolbox of healthy Coping Mechanisms was full and varied.

But unfortunately in 2023, they haven’t been working. Or maybe rather my brain/body wasn’t allowing them to work/have the time to focus on them. So instead I invite you to the UNHEALTHY coping skills that have been overtaking my brain and body in 2023.

You can probably guess it: lack of exercise, emotional eating, withdrawing from people, and more.

None of this was helping and all of that was filling up my list of Coping Mechanisms.

What does running have to do with this?

Well that little 1000 day #RONARunStreak brought me through a lot of dark times from 2020-2022 and with that ending on 26 December, I was feeling a loss of that daily accountability to prioritise me and move that body.

And in agreement with my physical therapist, I was to stop running completely after completing Tokyo Marathon on 5 March.

That means at the time of writing this I haven’t run a single step in 3 months. This is the longest I can think without running since I had my back surgery in January 2011.

You know what? I hate it.

I know I felt burned out on running near the end of the streak, but it was still providing me the nudge to focus on me… if even for 20 minutes a day.

Once that was gone and the marathons weren’t there to train for, it’s gone downhill.

What is the plan now?

With the help of my therapist, I now have a goal of recording 1 hour of “me” time every day. It doesn’t have to be 60 consecutive minutes - thank goodness as I immediately freaked thinking about how days at work have been going - but it is time to focus on things that bring me joy, relax me and most of all - don’t have to do with work!

That’s what I’ve been doing and for 12 days it has forced me to stop and make sure I am taking the time for my own mental health.

Some of the activities have been:

  • Coffee walks with friends

  • Family walks with the wife and pup

  • Riding my Peloton bike

  • Writing these blog posts again

  • Kayaking

  • Game Night

  • Picnics

What I’ve noticed for me is that a main source of energy is interacting with my friends and chosen family. While a social situation can potentially be something that depletes energy, I am strategically picking these meet-ups and making sure to not overly plan.

I promised her to make sure there was a balance as one thing I am really bad at is just being and relaxing… you know keeping yourself busy is a great way to avoid feeling those feelings! Your welcome for that hot tip! ;)

But this is forcing me to re-write the list of Healthy Coping Mechanisms that will work for me now. I am looking through the old toolbox to see what might still work, but I am learning - again - that what might’ve worked in 2011 or even 2021 might not work now. And that’s okay!

One trick I am pulling back out of the toolbox is tracking. For me tracking my food and drink intake is what works to make me pause before eating or drinking something to say:

Am I hungry/thirsty or am I sad/mad/frustrated?

This old adage that I learned back in 2009, will keep rearing its head back up just when I need it. Right now I really do. I am noticing I am going to the cupboard or fridge during intense/exhausting points in my day. But now I am not just aimlessly grabbing, I am taking stock of how I am feeling and pivoting: time for a meditation, quick snuggle with Laney.

It doesn’t work every time, but it is - this is sounding familiar - the pause to check in with my emotional/physical state.

I don’t know what the next week will bring, but for as long as I am unable to run - my easy/go-to coping mechanism - I am continuously trying new things to see what can bring that smile to my face, that sense of calm to my anxiety brain and what brings me a little peace of mind.

Do you have any healthy coping mechanisms that work for you? Have you been injured and have to completely pivot to a new go-to coping mechanism?