Oh hey Mojo, There You Are!!

One event can throw one's whole mini universe into a tailspin. Yup. That happened to me.

On December 21st, my mom sat me down and told me that my Grampa was diagnosed with cancer - melanoma to be specific.

So please friends wear sunscreen!!

My mom told me he had about 6 months to a year to live. Okay, not long enough but a timeframe I could work with. Especially since I am running The Boston Marathon with Tedy's Team in honor of my grandparents (who are both Stroke Heroes) in April and he would still be around for that.

... and then I got the phone call that I didn't expect.

On December 27 as I drove from one Weight Watchers meeting to another, my mom called to let me know my Grampa had passed away ... just 6 days after getting the original news. Well, that isn't the same as 6 months to a year now is it?

I broke down. Bawling my eyes out in my car.

And  enter the emotional eating.

I know better. I know that isn't how to handle the feelings.

But in the moment the fries and wine  ... and tears ... and quick fixes ... and "why bothers" won out.

I did keep my workouts up throughout the time, but as we all know you cannot out run/out work out a bad diet. Plus the runs had lost some of their lust even though I knew I was running/training for him.

So I finally stepped on the scale. And my jaw dropped. I hadn't seen that number on the scale in well over a year - maybe more.

The home scale said I had put on like 11 pounds in the week of Christmas and the week of Grampa news.

So right there. I knew something had to change.

I knew my Grampa didn't want me to undo all the hard work I had put into my weight loss.

So I just got off the scale and got back to business and basics.

And 3 days later 6 lbs were gone - so I didn't think that 11 lbs were right - most was definitely bloat.

And 5 days later 9 lbs were gone - back in business.

But seeing the number on the scale got me back in the mindset I needed.

My Grampa's wake/funeral was January 2-3 and I did the best I could to control the eating/drinking during that time with the family, but allowed myself to stray if it happened ...which it did. Mmm carbs. :P

But as soon as I got home I was back to my routine. And that routine sent me to Disney feeling healthy, happy and fit.

The Holiday/Sad/Emotional weight was gone and I left for Disney just 0.8 lbs over goal. Success.

Especially since I left for Disney on the One Year Anniversary of me reaching that goal weight with Weight Watchers. :)

And then there was Disney!

Did I enjoy a Mickey ice cream? Yes.

Did I enjoy a post race beer or two? Yes.

Did I run one of the best races of my life? Yes.

Did I have a freakin' blast? Yes.

Did I come home ready to get back to my packed snacks, my fruits and veggies with every meal, and my Ninja blender? Yes.

So I got more than just...

-a PR

-a great weekend with my wife & family

-the chance to meet Twitter friends in real life

-being able to experience 85 degree weather in January

...during that trip!

I got my mojo back!

I got that little spark that I needed to show no matter what I can conquer dreams, I can attain goals, I can indulge, but I can still be healthy and fit.

So now the Hell Yes I Can ... the I Am Worth It ... the "This Is My Life" moments now win out.

I don't NEED to bury my emotions or sadness with food. And if I do, it's okay - tomorrow is a new day.

I. Am. Human.

Most of all: I can make my Grampa proud with my actions, by continuing to reach for new dreams and sharing my story to try and show someone else that anything's possible.