#SnowstormStella Ramblings

After an amazing weekend with friends and puppies, it has been a RUDE awakening into this work week. I'm not sure if I blame it on Daylight Savings Time OR I am having one of those off weeks. 

Is anyone else feeling the same way?

I am going to bed at the same time, but I am feeling like I cannot catch up on my tiredness.

Before we dig into the ramblings, I wanted to share PRO Compression's latest Sock Of The Month because well... Look at it! 

I told you all how I overslurged this weekend and I did, but I was/am proud of myself for tracking it all. Well I am now working on trying to get that negative number down. I wasn't going to share with you all, but I know I feel better after I do. And well you all might be in the same boat as I am some day.

That's right! I am in the hole 66 points. I have used all of my weekly points (35) and all of my available Fitpoints so far this week. All I can do now is focus on staying on plan and earning back as many Fitpoints as possible.

I know where I took wrong turns this past weekend, but every single choice was worth the points. Remember I said that was my goal this week: only to use points on things that are worth it!

And they allll were! :) 

While seeing the number at the end of the weekend was tough, I was proud of myself for owning up to all of the choices, accepting them, treating myself with kindness and moving on.

Now today is another story. The food has totally been on point since I didn't bring any junk food or booze into the house before the snow started. But mentally I am feeling wicked beat down.

Have you ever been in those situations were you feel like you are giving your all to some person or some situation and getting absolutely NOTHING back in return?

I am being my normal, nice, helpful self, yet feel like nothing I do is working. There have been some instances in the past few years where I get into these ruts. 

I try hard and people just aren't receptive. It causes me to doubt my own self and my worthiness in those situations.

Am I not worth their time? Do they see something wrong with me that I don't? They liked hanging out with me for awhile, but now they just stopped? What did I or didn't I do? 

Rationally I know people come and go in our lives for whatever reasons, but sometimes I just want to reach out and say WHY? What is wrong with me? 

But I don't. I don't want to bother people. But I feel a lack of answers at the same time.

Is there a stipulation of time to reach out? There are friendships I have lost sleep over for years wondering what happened. 

Then I wonder - those people haven't reached out to me so maybe they don't care enough about the friendship/time we spent together.

I try to live in the moment and celebrate the people that do want to be around me and love me for who I am.

But I pine over the ones lost. 

Have you ever been in a situation like that? What did you do? Did you try to just release and move on or did you reach out and inquire?